She’s not crazy, just very expressive

I confess, I’ve had my moments where I thought I acted a tad crazy. I’ve sent a few “have a nice life” texts and done many other things too embarrassing to talk about but this is what I’ve concluded: women are not crazy, we are just very expressive.

Guys would probably roll their eyes at this description but it’s true. The conflict between men and women erupts from the fact that we don’t understand each other. Men are not expressive people. They avoid conflict as much as possible. They deal with situations by keeping quiet and bottling it all up. A girl sends a text, 5 pages long and he responds with “ok” or “cool” or not at all. This isn’t because he doesn’t care, its because his not as expressive as you are and quiet frankly 5 pages is a lot to take in.

Women on the other hand, have a lot to say and we are not shy to share it all. I’ve found that my biggest downfall is this one policy of mine that says “he must know”. I can’t be upset alone when he does something wrong, so he must know. He must know when I’m happy. He must know when I’m sad. He must know when he has pissed me off. I’m a communicator, talking about it makes me feel better. But the more we express and let it out, the crazier we look to them.

With every single situation where a girl went “crazy”, there’s an underlying cause or factor. Highly unlikely that one wakes up and decides to be annoying or foolish for no reason. On a normal day, girls want to express themselves, imagine on a day when she’s been provoked, how much more of her emotions does she need to let out. Ever noticed how most men have a ‘crazy ex-girlfriend’? They portray themselves as being complete angels in the previous relationship but then the ex just went crazy. This story is getting old. The word crazy says a million things so there’s no need to say any more or explain further as to why things ended.

So I’ve slashed a tyre….not my proudest moment but definitely felt satisfied for a while. Usually people raise an eyebrow at that and I would have too if it was someone else telling me they did. But when I tell the story as to why I did it, or detail the events that led to it, most people if not all, say “you should have done more than slash a tyre”. I’m not condoning any violent behaviour but simply showing that each act of “crazy” has a trigger.

We are also called crazy because we love big and have big expectations about how we should be loved back. We want to be loved like Rachel McAdams in The Notebook or Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. When we express this, we are called crazy again. Look at it this way, if you are half an hour late for a date and didn’t try to call, her reaction will be labelled crazy. She isn’t crazy, in her mind you simply don’t care about her. What’s really happening in those situations, is that our thoughts and feelings are being shut down. It removes any responsibility from the man, since you’re not being rational so they’re ‘off the hook’. Using the word ‘crazy’ in a situation in which a woman is trying to express her opinion, is intended to invalidate her thoughts and feelings. By doing this, her opinion is nullified leading her to question her own sanity and validity.

We tend to speak in code a lot, give hints here and there hoping men will get it. Unfortunately men never do. My personal opinion behind this way of communication is that women are trying not to sound needy. They are giving the men a freedom of choice but sincerely hoping they choose them. I don’t believe this method works because men are simple creatures who believe in simplicity and minimalistic way of life. However, no matter what means of communication she picks none of them can justify using the word crazy to describe her

Its safe to say women are open books, speaking volumes and keeping nothing in. This is their nature and what makes them different from men. If everyone went about their life silent then things would be boring, less excitement in the world.

Photo by Autumn Goodman on Unsplash

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One Reply to “She’s not crazy, just very expressive”

  1. We all deserve a quality of love that can never be described as cheap and no, our “crazy moments” are not always our best. Like you so aptly say there is always a reason behind our tempestuous emotions…like when you’ve invested all your energy and heart into a relationship with a man who finally made it worth risking it all, only to find that you’re still just an option to him. All that crazy and emotion, is energy! But no reasonable man would discredit our emotions by calling us crazy.

    Liked by 1 person

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